FORGIVENESS - NNENNA MOZIE (17/03/2014)

The other day I had a conversation with someone who had hurt me a few months ago, towards the end of the conversation they began to apologise for the things that had transpired between us. Before they could finish I interjected saying "I forgave you a long time ago, before this conversation" 
    As human beings we are generally creatures that are full of pride, no one wants to apologise and no one wants to forgive because no one wants to be perceived as weak. However it is important that we refrain from viewing forgiveness as a relinquishment of power and rather as a process that aids us in bettering ourselves and most importantly leads us to happiness. 
  You've probably heard people say after coming out of a bad situation that they need closure from the other party, now don't get me wrong it's always good to gain closure and understanding but a lot of times as humans we don't fully understand some of the actions we take; therefore we cannot offer the other party that closure or the apology they feel they're entitled to. This is why we must forgive without being asked for forgiveness, forgiving someone regardless of them offering an apology or not allows you to let go of a situation that is probably holding you back whether you know it or not. Make no mistakes about it this isn't me saying allow people walk all over you, but for self growth and happiness accept the hurt you've experienced cannot be changed and move forward. No situation is without a lesson to be learned, once you're able to view hurt you've experienced as a learning curve and therefore gaining knowledge from that previous position of vulnerability, forgiveness inevitably follows suit. Forgiving is without doubt one of the hardest things to do hence why it has been said many a time that forgiveness is divine, but once you understand that this is something you must do for yourself rather than the other party the gratification and joy that follows makes it easier to do over again.
   It is paramount that we see our happiness as being in no one else's hands but our own, you cannot control the actions others will take but you can control how they effect you and if they will hold you back. By not allowing ourselves that gift of forgiving and moving forward we become slaves to the mistakes of others. 

The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong. - Mahatma Gandhi